Poetry

Estrangement - Part I

Someday I will be able to walk down the street
and your names will be forgotten to me.
Who you were and what you did will
slowly begin to mean nothing
fading into obscurity,
just like you.

Total freedom will be bestowed to me
for surviving the years of emotional torment
endured simply because I was your daughter
and didn’t know any better.

Now I understand so much more.
All those open doors
that shoulda been closed.
All those times you wanted
more from me
than I felt comfortable to give.
Yelling at me
because I refused to give you a kiss.
Laying guilt trips.
That’s what you both always
did best.

Invading my life,
Thinking you have the right to walk all over me
like I am the damn ground beneath your feet.
Been doing it so long, you might not even be aware.
No matter, I’m not your babygirl anymore.
You can’t raise that belt up to me
and expect me to shrink back in terror.
You step up to me and
You better be ready to party.
Because the last thing you’re expecting
will be the first thing I throw at ya.

Now time has taken years away.
You thought you could get your claws
into my daughter and warp her mind.
Perpetuate the craziness
that I’ve spent my life running from?

Oh hell no, not on my time.
Sooner lose it all then let you
influence her.
I know,
heard it all before.
Supposed to respect ya
because you’re the parents.
Be loyal to the family
because where are you at
Without ‘em?
This societal myth we fool
ourselves with.
Now I understand,
It’s just blood.

So here I stand
and I find myself
parentless.
And for a moment,
I stop to ask,
How do I feel?
Goddamn….
I finally feel sane.

By Mara McWilliams

Please note:
These original poems are all copyrighted and may not be used without the explicit permission of the author.

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